Lately I have been into audio recording.
I listen to This American Life until my ears bleed. I scour the storycorps website looking for new slices of life to devour.
One might say I am obsessed.
But now my obsession has shifted ever so slightly. Now I am obsessed with doing my own recordings. My first endeavors included recording my Uncle's phone messages he leaves me and taping my friend talking about his past. Storycorps assures me that there are interesting stories to be captured out there. Ira Glass tells me that failure will come before success does. But as much as I am interested in hearing another story it doesn't seem to do much more than whet my curiosity.
I am seeking your (yes you the reader) assistance to make this more exciting for me. I am looking for a telenovela/ soap opera to record using my voice and the voice of others. I don't know how many people are into writing soap operas, but you should be.
Let us make this interesting...Just because I have no idea how many people will even respond to this.
I want your soap operas!
The guidelines are:
- no longer than 4,000 words of dialogue.
- it must be double spaced.
- make sure there are at least two characters (preferably more).
- must be in english.
- DEADLINE: May 28, 2009 (thursday)
*Note: this can have a definitive ending, but preferably I would like this to be in the format of a show that will have many episodes.
Please email this to phantomlipszine@gmail.com
The soap opera the editors and I like the best will receive $10 (I know not much but I don't have a job!) and a free copy of our first issue of Phantom Lips!
So get on this people!!
[phantom.]
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
No wonder.
No wonder the Obama administration changed the name of Toxic Assets.
It sounds like a giant beer dump taken the morning after a rough night of partying when you woke up in bed with the fat chick you used to tell your friends, "shouldn't walk near the San Andreas fault line."
It sounds like a giant beer dump taken the morning after a rough night of partying when you woke up in bed with the fat chick you used to tell your friends, "shouldn't walk near the San Andreas fault line."
Saturday, March 14, 2009
Psychic Bet.
ME: Hey, what's up?
UNCLE ED: Uh, Katy. When did you say your friend was moving out here to live in the house?
ME:Well, like May. But that actually might not happen. Why?
UNCLE ED: Well it seems I might not be able to drive sometime in April.
ME: Wait are you serious? Why?
UNCLE ED: I got a letter that implied the district attorney might take away my license for that time I was arrested in Costa Mesa.
ME: Wait, I'm confused... Was it implied, or stated.
UNCLE ED: Uh, well. It was implied.
ME: Wait, what exactly did the letter say?
UNCLE ED: Uh, it said. It said in April that my life will be turned upside down. Anyways, the only thing I can think of is the ticket in Costa Mesa.
ME: Uncle Ed. Did you get this letter from the District Attorney or a Psychic??
UNCLE ED: ...
ME: Uncle Ed, tell me.
UNCLE ED: A psychic.
ME:So all it said was your life will be turned upside down in April? You do realize that this a ploy to get you to send more money right?
UNCLE ED: Well anyways, the only thing I can think of is the arrest in Costa Mesa.
ME: Uncle Ed! Seriously, how many times have these psychics been right. I want a number and an example.
UNCLE ED:..... Well, like 30% of the time.
ME: Remember when the psychic said, "something bad will happen to someone in your family." And you thought my parents were getting a divorce. And then, they didn't. So when have they been right?
UNCLE ED: They said my mom's heart murmur was going to get worse.... and it did.
ME:Did they say that exactly? Or did they say something more vague
UNCLE ED: They said her heart problems would get worse.
ME: Yeah, but Grandma was 90. That is a pretty safe psychic bet.
UNCLE ED: Well, all I can think of is that they will probably take my license away.
ME: Okay, that ISN'T going to happen.
UNCLE ED: Well what if it does?
ME: Then you will take the bus like other people. Like all your friends do. Or like I do.
UNCLE ED:Anyways, I was thinking I would sell the house and move in with Kathy.
ME: Why on earth would you move to Colorado to live with my parents if you had no car?? It's not like you have a job to go to anyways.
UNCLE ED: I would need someone to drive me around. (Side Note: both my parents have jobs... this would NOT happen) Uh, well maybe I should hold off on looking for a job then. Just in case I lose my license.
ME: You aren't looking anyways... This is stupid though, you shouldn't let a psychic by mail rule your life!
UNCLE ED: Anyways, should I call the court to ask if they are going to take away my license?
ME: *sigh* No, that probably isn't a good idea. They might change their minds and take it away because you sound crazy.
UNCLE ED: So, um, you don't think I should?
ME: NO.
UNCLE ED: Anyways, we will see.
ME: If you get your license taken away I will pay you 20 bucks and we can go see a movie.
UNCLE ED: Uh, Katy. When did you say your friend was moving out here to live in the house?
ME:Well, like May. But that actually might not happen. Why?
UNCLE ED: Well it seems I might not be able to drive sometime in April.
ME: Wait are you serious? Why?
UNCLE ED: I got a letter that implied the district attorney might take away my license for that time I was arrested in Costa Mesa.
ME: Wait, I'm confused... Was it implied, or stated.
UNCLE ED: Uh, well. It was implied.
ME: Wait, what exactly did the letter say?
UNCLE ED: Uh, it said. It said in April that my life will be turned upside down. Anyways, the only thing I can think of is the ticket in Costa Mesa.
ME: Uncle Ed. Did you get this letter from the District Attorney or a Psychic??
UNCLE ED: ...
ME: Uncle Ed, tell me.
UNCLE ED: A psychic.
ME:So all it said was your life will be turned upside down in April? You do realize that this a ploy to get you to send more money right?
UNCLE ED: Well anyways, the only thing I can think of is the arrest in Costa Mesa.
ME: Uncle Ed! Seriously, how many times have these psychics been right. I want a number and an example.
UNCLE ED:..... Well, like 30% of the time.
ME: Remember when the psychic said, "something bad will happen to someone in your family." And you thought my parents were getting a divorce. And then, they didn't. So when have they been right?
UNCLE ED: They said my mom's heart murmur was going to get worse.... and it did.
ME:Did they say that exactly? Or did they say something more vague
UNCLE ED: They said her heart problems would get worse.
ME: Yeah, but Grandma was 90. That is a pretty safe psychic bet.
UNCLE ED: Well, all I can think of is that they will probably take my license away.
ME: Okay, that ISN'T going to happen.
UNCLE ED: Well what if it does?
ME: Then you will take the bus like other people. Like all your friends do. Or like I do.
UNCLE ED:Anyways, I was thinking I would sell the house and move in with Kathy.
ME: Why on earth would you move to Colorado to live with my parents if you had no car?? It's not like you have a job to go to anyways.
UNCLE ED: I would need someone to drive me around. (Side Note: both my parents have jobs... this would NOT happen) Uh, well maybe I should hold off on looking for a job then. Just in case I lose my license.
ME: You aren't looking anyways... This is stupid though, you shouldn't let a psychic by mail rule your life!
UNCLE ED: Anyways, should I call the court to ask if they are going to take away my license?
ME: *sigh* No, that probably isn't a good idea. They might change their minds and take it away because you sound crazy.
UNCLE ED: So, um, you don't think I should?
ME: NO.
UNCLE ED: Anyways, we will see.
ME: If you get your license taken away I will pay you 20 bucks and we can go see a movie.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
19 Reasons why I love my Uncle Ed, and why you should too.
1. He lounges in his white underwear and t-shirt until the wee hours of the morning.
2. He laughs at extremely inappropriate moments, i.e. when people get hurt on TV, when something bad happens to someone on TV, basically when anything that is bad happens…on TV.
3. He also laughs at and is non-erotically intrigued by nudity, on TV.
4. He thinks his computer is trying to trick him during computer chess games, and would love to discuss it with you at length.
5. You can never convince him that Bigfoot isn’t real.
6. He never uses the word shit unless he is talking about the size of a swallow’s bowel movement.
7. He tries to get me a date with the local Mormon missionaries.
8. He buys juice in bulk.
9. He likes unnecessary cooking gadgets such as a rotisserie or a portable radiation cooker.
10. When he eats he packs it into his cheeks like he is preparing for a long winter.
11. His favorite joke is to put an ice pack on my back or to put a stuffed animal spider on my pillow. He does this 3 times a week, and laughs hard every time.
12. While watching a sex scene from “Y Tu Mama Tambien” he asked, “Is this what young people do when their parents aren’t home?”
13. He is a firm believer in the lottery and doesn’t understand that there is an element of chance associated with buying a lottery ticket. Therefore getting extremely mad when he doesn’t win. This happens a lot.
14. He tells me a really random piece of information that I know nothing about and then asks me to clarify. I.e. “Katy, KFC has stopped treating their chicken with a hormone that helps preserve the meat and now I see bruises on my chicken. Why would they do that?”
15. He is one man and he has three computers.
16. His friend Tom calls almost every day at 15-minute intervals for 2 hours, even when he is told my Uncle isn’t home.
17. When modeling new clothes or a new haircut for me, he spins so I can get the full effect.
18. His interest in Internet porn is limited strictly to the fact that you can get it for free, on the Internet.
19. He has now started wearing suspenders for function, Amen to that.
2. He laughs at extremely inappropriate moments, i.e. when people get hurt on TV, when something bad happens to someone on TV, basically when anything that is bad happens…on TV.
3. He also laughs at and is non-erotically intrigued by nudity, on TV.
4. He thinks his computer is trying to trick him during computer chess games, and would love to discuss it with you at length.
5. You can never convince him that Bigfoot isn’t real.
6. He never uses the word shit unless he is talking about the size of a swallow’s bowel movement.
7. He tries to get me a date with the local Mormon missionaries.
8. He buys juice in bulk.
9. He likes unnecessary cooking gadgets such as a rotisserie or a portable radiation cooker.
10. When he eats he packs it into his cheeks like he is preparing for a long winter.
11. His favorite joke is to put an ice pack on my back or to put a stuffed animal spider on my pillow. He does this 3 times a week, and laughs hard every time.
12. While watching a sex scene from “Y Tu Mama Tambien” he asked, “Is this what young people do when their parents aren’t home?”
13. He is a firm believer in the lottery and doesn’t understand that there is an element of chance associated with buying a lottery ticket. Therefore getting extremely mad when he doesn’t win. This happens a lot.
14. He tells me a really random piece of information that I know nothing about and then asks me to clarify. I.e. “Katy, KFC has stopped treating their chicken with a hormone that helps preserve the meat and now I see bruises on my chicken. Why would they do that?”
15. He is one man and he has three computers.
16. His friend Tom calls almost every day at 15-minute intervals for 2 hours, even when he is told my Uncle isn’t home.
17. When modeling new clothes or a new haircut for me, he spins so I can get the full effect.
18. His interest in Internet porn is limited strictly to the fact that you can get it for free, on the Internet.
19. He has now started wearing suspenders for function, Amen to that.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
Meet Uncle Ed
Katy's LEGENDARY Uncle Ed leaves a message about his mom, Barbara Bush, and open heart surgery. Listen here.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Drenched In Irony
"I feel like there's not enough rock bands out there, especially when we go on the road. It's tough to find other bands out there, because either they're making a record, or they just got done touring. So kids: Start rock bands. Set down the 'Guitar Hero,' learn how to play an actual guitar and start a band, because it's hard to find more bands to put a solid rock-and-roll package together, to get out there. It's getting harder and harder, but I think we've done it." -- Chad Kroeger, Nickelback
Wow.
Wow.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
From The Bowels of My Photobucket
Some days ago I logged onto my old Photobucket account for the first time in probably three years to find this little treasure:
No need to ask why. You already know it was for tattoo consideration. But in doing so I discovered a powder keg of old photos, long forgotten. These are Early Kyle, 2004 - 2005, when I listened to nothing but Coalesce and took girls to see movies like Mysterious Skin and Elephant for first dates.
No need to ask why. You already know it was for tattoo consideration. But in doing so I discovered a powder keg of old photos, long forgotten. These are Early Kyle, 2004 - 2005, when I listened to nothing but Coalesce and took girls to see movies like Mysterious Skin and Elephant for first dates.
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Lovely, Lovely, Bookies
I've bought/read far too many books since last semester, so I'll choose a few of the highlights/ones I remember. With that said... Stuff I've been reading:
1. John Steinbeck
Of Mice and Men
So I know it's really inexcusable that I just now read this book, but better late than never, right? It (like all Steinbeck books) was really phenomenally good and (unlike most Steinbeck books) was an insanely quick read. If you are as lame as I am and have yet to read this book, read it. Immediately. Whether you like Steinbeck or not.
2. Joyce Carol Oates
Black Water
I haven't decided if I liked this book yet. It was entertaining, and it was definitely an interesting approach, but my internal jury is still out on the writing style. It's basically a fictionalized account of the whole Ted Kennedy scandal, which sounded fascinating, but turned out to be only mildly interesting. I usually love Oates, but she kind of seemed to drop the ball on this one. I feel like she could have done so much more with the story and her writing was a bit (intentionally, I suspect) choppier than usual. It was a pretty enjoyable read, but I don't anticipate ever picking it up again. More of a library book than a keeper.
3. Cormac McCarthy
The Road
Once again, I'm probably the last person in the world to have read this book, but in my defense, I owned it before Oprah put it on her stupid list. I wasn't floored by it at first, but by the end I was in love. It's just a really simple, sweet story about a father and his son who happen to be coping with the apocalypse.
4. Noisy Outlaws, Unfriendly Blobs...
This is a collection of really amusing short stories. I'm a sucker for anything that is equally appealing to children and adults, and these fit that description pretty well. Like most McSweeneys books, this one is super great.
5. Dave Eggers
How We Are Hungry
It's Eggers. Enough said.
6. Craig Thompson
Carnet de Voyage
I picked this up at Open on Chinch's recommendation, and it's quite possibly one of the most interesting books I've read all winter. It's a really exceptional example of a travel log, and Thompson's drawings capture his surroundings better than any photograph could.
7. Alison Bechdel
Fun Home
This was also one of Chinch's recommendations. He shot me an email about it and it sounded really interesting. I stumbled upon it on the 3 for 2 rack, and decided to pick it up. Cliffs notes version: lesbian's memoir about gay father + his death + crazy amounts of nerdy literature references = really sad yet disturbingly amusing book that I'm not at all surprised Chinch liked.
1. John Steinbeck
Of Mice and Men
So I know it's really inexcusable that I just now read this book, but better late than never, right? It (like all Steinbeck books) was really phenomenally good and (unlike most Steinbeck books) was an insanely quick read. If you are as lame as I am and have yet to read this book, read it. Immediately. Whether you like Steinbeck or not.
2. Joyce Carol Oates
Black Water
I haven't decided if I liked this book yet. It was entertaining, and it was definitely an interesting approach, but my internal jury is still out on the writing style. It's basically a fictionalized account of the whole Ted Kennedy scandal, which sounded fascinating, but turned out to be only mildly interesting. I usually love Oates, but she kind of seemed to drop the ball on this one. I feel like she could have done so much more with the story and her writing was a bit (intentionally, I suspect) choppier than usual. It was a pretty enjoyable read, but I don't anticipate ever picking it up again. More of a library book than a keeper.
3. Cormac McCarthy
The Road
Once again, I'm probably the last person in the world to have read this book, but in my defense, I owned it before Oprah put it on her stupid list. I wasn't floored by it at first, but by the end I was in love. It's just a really simple, sweet story about a father and his son who happen to be coping with the apocalypse.
4. Noisy Outlaws, Unfriendly Blobs...
This is a collection of really amusing short stories. I'm a sucker for anything that is equally appealing to children and adults, and these fit that description pretty well. Like most McSweeneys books, this one is super great.
5. Dave Eggers
How We Are Hungry
It's Eggers. Enough said.
6. Craig Thompson
Carnet de Voyage
I picked this up at Open on Chinch's recommendation, and it's quite possibly one of the most interesting books I've read all winter. It's a really exceptional example of a travel log, and Thompson's drawings capture his surroundings better than any photograph could.
7. Alison Bechdel
Fun Home
This was also one of Chinch's recommendations. He shot me an email about it and it sounded really interesting. I stumbled upon it on the 3 for 2 rack, and decided to pick it up. Cliffs notes version: lesbian's memoir about gay father + his death + crazy amounts of nerdy literature references = really sad yet disturbingly amusing book that I'm not at all surprised Chinch liked.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Snapping Away A Photo-A-Day ('Til Death)
This is an excerpt from an article written by Chris Higgins:
Yesterday I came across a slightly mysterious website — a collection of Polaroids, one per day, from March 31, 1979 through October 25, 1997. There’s no author listed, no contact info, and no other indication as to where these came from. So, naturally, I started looking through the photos. I was stunned by what I found.
In 1979 the photos start casually, with pictures of friends, picnics, dinners, and so on. Here’s an example from April 23, 1979 (I believe the photographer of the series is the man in the left foreground in this picture):
By 1980, we start to figure out that the photographer is a filmmaker. He gets a letter from the American Film Festival and takes a photo on January 30, 1980:
Some days he doesn’t photograph anything interesting, so instead takes a photo of the date.
Throughout the 1980s we see more family/fun photos, but also some glimpses of the photographer’s filmmaking and music. Here’s someone recording audio in a film editing studio from February 5, 1983:
The photographer is a big Mets fan. Here’s a shot of him and a friend with Mets tickets on April 29, 1986:
In the late 1980s we start seeing more evidence that the photographer is also a musician. He plays the accordion, and has friends who play various stringed instruments. What kind of music are they playing? Here’s a photo from July 2, 1989 of the photographer with his instrument:
In 1991, we see visual evidence of the photographs so far. The photographer has been collecting them in Polaroid boxes inside suitcases, as seen in this photo from March 30, 1991:
On December 6, 1993, he marks Frank Zappa’s death with this photo:
The 1990s seem to be a good time for the photographer. We see him spending more time with friends, and less time photographing street subjects (of which there are many — I just didn’t include them above). Perhaps one of his films made it to IFC, the Independent Film Channel, as seen in this photo from December 18, 1996:
Throughout early 1997, we start to see the photographer himself more and more often. Sometimes his face is obscured behind objects. Other times he’s passed out on the couch. When he’s shown with people, he isn’t smiling. On May 2 1997, something bad has happened:
By May 4, 1997, it’s clear that he has cancer:
His health rapidly declining, the photographer takes a mirror-self-portrait on June 2, 1997:
By the end of that month, he’s completely bald:
His health continues to decline through July, August, and September 1997, with several trips to the hospital and apparent chemotherapy. On the bright side, on September 11, 1997, the photographer’s hair starts to grow back:
On October 5, 1997, it’s pretty clear what this picture means:
Two days later we see the wedding:
And just a few weeks later he’s back in the hospital. On October 24, 1997, we see a friend playing music in the hospital room:
The next day the photographer dies.
Yesterday I came across a slightly mysterious website — a collection of Polaroids, one per day, from March 31, 1979 through October 25, 1997. There’s no author listed, no contact info, and no other indication as to where these came from. So, naturally, I started looking through the photos. I was stunned by what I found.
In 1979 the photos start casually, with pictures of friends, picnics, dinners, and so on. Here’s an example from April 23, 1979 (I believe the photographer of the series is the man in the left foreground in this picture):
By 1980, we start to figure out that the photographer is a filmmaker. He gets a letter from the American Film Festival and takes a photo on January 30, 1980:
Some days he doesn’t photograph anything interesting, so instead takes a photo of the date.
Throughout the 1980s we see more family/fun photos, but also some glimpses of the photographer’s filmmaking and music. Here’s someone recording audio in a film editing studio from February 5, 1983:
The photographer is a big Mets fan. Here’s a shot of him and a friend with Mets tickets on April 29, 1986:
In the late 1980s we start seeing more evidence that the photographer is also a musician. He plays the accordion, and has friends who play various stringed instruments. What kind of music are they playing? Here’s a photo from July 2, 1989 of the photographer with his instrument:
In 1991, we see visual evidence of the photographs so far. The photographer has been collecting them in Polaroid boxes inside suitcases, as seen in this photo from March 30, 1991:
On December 6, 1993, he marks Frank Zappa’s death with this photo:
The 1990s seem to be a good time for the photographer. We see him spending more time with friends, and less time photographing street subjects (of which there are many — I just didn’t include them above). Perhaps one of his films made it to IFC, the Independent Film Channel, as seen in this photo from December 18, 1996:
Throughout early 1997, we start to see the photographer himself more and more often. Sometimes his face is obscured behind objects. Other times he’s passed out on the couch. When he’s shown with people, he isn’t smiling. On May 2 1997, something bad has happened:
By May 4, 1997, it’s clear that he has cancer:
His health rapidly declining, the photographer takes a mirror-self-portrait on June 2, 1997:
By the end of that month, he’s completely bald:
His health continues to decline through July, August, and September 1997, with several trips to the hospital and apparent chemotherapy. On the bright side, on September 11, 1997, the photographer’s hair starts to grow back:
On October 5, 1997, it’s pretty clear what this picture means:
Two days later we see the wedding:
And just a few weeks later he’s back in the hospital. On October 24, 1997, we see a friend playing music in the hospital room:
The next day the photographer dies.
It all began with a kiss.
"There had been days and nights when the memory of their kiss had burned and burned on his lips..."
Welcome, everyone, to the Phantom Lips blog.
As we begin publishing hopefully within the next month, this blog will be used as an online supplement to our written publication. As co-editor of Phantom Lips I wanted to let you know a little more about our vision for Phantom Lips, and our hopes.
The idea of Phantom Lips is to provide a written resource for self and communal exploration. Our desire for ourselves, our contributors and our readers is to discover something that we have never seen before, something that will weigh like an anchor in our hearts, and unveil a new horizon of possibilities for us. We want you to find your phantom limb, to suddenly feel the fingers of an extremity you never knew you had before or had even missed.
We chose the term “Phantom Lips” because the things that we discover about ourselves and about others has a phantom-like effect but has the depth of a romance as well. This is an opportunity to try new things and to test your abilities.
Phantom Lips will not be your ordinary Literary Journal or ‘Zine. We desire to produce the quality of a journal, but our main goal is to encourage others to work on new things whether it be alone or with others. Often times we learn more about ourselves, when we have the opportunity to collaborate. We hope that you find your Phantom Lips throughout this whole process.
If you are interested in contributing, or helping in any way feel free to contact both editors: Kyle and Katy.
Submissions, questions, and anything else can be sent to either phantomlipszine@gmail.com or editorial@phantomlips.com
We are accepting all kinds of submissions, whether it be: poetry, essays, reviews, fiction, complaints, photography, art, and anything else you can wrap your mind around. There are no restrictions so send in anything. But also try something new to send in, we desire for you to try something new, even if it doesn’t work out.
Thanks!
Katy
Welcome, everyone, to the Phantom Lips blog.
As we begin publishing hopefully within the next month, this blog will be used as an online supplement to our written publication. As co-editor of Phantom Lips I wanted to let you know a little more about our vision for Phantom Lips, and our hopes.
The idea of Phantom Lips is to provide a written resource for self and communal exploration. Our desire for ourselves, our contributors and our readers is to discover something that we have never seen before, something that will weigh like an anchor in our hearts, and unveil a new horizon of possibilities for us. We want you to find your phantom limb, to suddenly feel the fingers of an extremity you never knew you had before or had even missed.
We chose the term “Phantom Lips” because the things that we discover about ourselves and about others has a phantom-like effect but has the depth of a romance as well. This is an opportunity to try new things and to test your abilities.
Phantom Lips will not be your ordinary Literary Journal or ‘Zine. We desire to produce the quality of a journal, but our main goal is to encourage others to work on new things whether it be alone or with others. Often times we learn more about ourselves, when we have the opportunity to collaborate. We hope that you find your Phantom Lips throughout this whole process.
If you are interested in contributing, or helping in any way feel free to contact both editors: Kyle and Katy.
Submissions, questions, and anything else can be sent to either phantomlipszine@gmail.com or editorial@phantomlips.com
We are accepting all kinds of submissions, whether it be: poetry, essays, reviews, fiction, complaints, photography, art, and anything else you can wrap your mind around. There are no restrictions so send in anything. But also try something new to send in, we desire for you to try something new, even if it doesn’t work out.
Thanks!
Katy
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